I found him in his van stirring a giant tub of adhesive. Bought for a fiver, he said, with supreme relish and an inane grin, retail value one hundred quid. Spoken with the matter-of-fact air of a chap who was used to such bargains. Satisfied, relaxed and definitely sleepy.
I'd met Baz down the Marquis the night before, but prior to that it had been a long time. I'd been down in Brighton getting married, making babies, commuting to London. He'd been gallivanting round the world. India, Thailand, Tibet, Guildford, Milton Keynes, all sorts of exotic places. Come and see my van, he'd said, so here I was, the fumes already hitting me hard. Guess I picked the wrong day to quit sniffing glue.
I mentioned the scratch I'd seen down the right hand side. 'Handbrake snapped off,' he said, sheepishly, 'found myself rolling down Dad's drive.' He'd fixed the handbrake himself. I had visions of a broom handle rammed in its place.
It was an old VW. Technically a transit but an abnormally large one, once royal blue, now faded and sorry. He'd gutted the thing and was in the process of converting it into a home. Didn't pay for this, he said, or that, or that, got this for a tenner, found this by the road. Thriftiest man I know and the son of a carpenter, his handiwork was beautiful. Fitted bookshelves, nifty bed-come-sofa, cute little gas stove mounted on a perfectly-crafted "kitchen" area. 'What'll you do about water?' I asked. 'You can always find an outside tap,' he said with a sly wink.
'Where are you off to?' I asked. 'Two weeks in Norway, ' he replied, 'doing a bit of "environmental research" then up North in the van.' I wasn't sure whether snowboarding counts as "environmental research" but hey, why not?
He showed me the leisure battery, explained the relay switch, demonstrated where his gadgets would charge from. TV, laptop, phone. He was in the process of insulating the van.
'Regarding insurance and all that, is this legal?' I asked. He laughed, 'don't you worry about that. It will get a bit complicated when I install my wood-burning stove....'
Last I heard he was working as a "freelance environmental consultant" somewhere in the North of England. But what I'm really trying to say is, if you see a large blue van rolling backwards down a hill, a trail of burning books in its wake, chased by some angry victims of water theft, let me know.
The "sequel" to Perdido Street Station, one of my absolute favourites, and I'm enjoying it just as much, if not more so.
The worlds and races Mieville creates are simply superb. If you've not read this series and you like "weird fiction" then please crack on and get reading.
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hehehe, milton keynes as an exotic destination!
"..once royal blue, now faded and sorry." but with its own little kitchenette, who can complain? hehe i'll keep an eye open for him though, sounds like this one might even be able to make his way down to the south of africa :)
20 years ago we lived in Seattle across the street from a couple who, each summer, had friends arrive in a classic "hippie bus" - old school bus converted into rolling residence, painted up with psychedelic patterns. They'd stay for a month or more, tinkering with improvements to the bus, then off they'd go down the coast. it was always a different group, with a different bus. One year a guy cut a hole in the roof of the school bus, and welded on the body of a Volkswagen bus, like a giant cupola. Wonder how many bridges it passed under.
Sometimes I worry that if I bought a large sailboat, my life would be like this.
Is he married?
When I was in my teens, my parents brought home a VW bus. It was the first vehicle that we ever owned that could haul our entire family, legally. *sigh* I loved that bus. The room alone, was worth all the times we had to get out and push to give it a good jump start. Thank God for steep driveways.
conjures up images of chico and the man. chico had him a pretty gnarly van.
Well, I can appreciate creative thriftiness - I once "saved" a discarded table by reattaching its legs with a hot glue gun (hey, it worked) (well, it worked until summer came and remelted the glue, admittedly) but, I dunno, this fella seems to be taking it a step ot two beyond mere creative thriftiness.
Keep your eye on that one. He's a blog fodder gold mine.
I always notice the outside tap when it turns on and I really do come running to see who's using it! I'll be sure to let you know! Of course, he's in England, so this won't happen.
I was on the edge of my seat and reading wicked fast, nervous this was going to end badly. Or, worse than it does....
in my younger days i would have thought that was so cool...lol.
Now THAT dude sounds like someone I'd love to know! What a renegade!
Loved the remark about the broom handle! I can just picture that beaten-up looking thing!
Wood burning stove? Could he mount one in an '05 Caravan?
A wood burning stove in a transit van? If you want to find out about your mate Baz I suggest you keep reading the Darwin awards because I'm sure he'll be in there soon.
Fantastic! What a visual....
Sounds like a party on wheels, actually.
I'm partial to those industrial sized permanent markers myself.
Why do they all end up heading North? It's as though an invisible magnet pulls them out of the dark hole that is the South, and draws them towards the beauty that is the (far) North.
I have a pal who gave up his shoe shine business in Trafalgar Square, moved to Harrogate, made a baby, started a business, and now all he does is eat in fish restaurants, blogs every Monday, and drinks shandy.
By the way... you left your cherry blossom in the van, I'll drop it in on my way back South.
I don't suppose you could give me a push?
Baz sounds like my kind of guy.
Tsk, tsk, hardly the steady type to attract a sensible gal. Will clearly come to no good.
Sounds like the car I left college with...I want a woodstove in my Honda now!
All he's missing is a disco ball. Right? Right?
Interesting people you know in life. :)
Clearly a keeper.
Years ago when I was busing up and down the West Coast of the U.S., I had an old school bus painted with psychedelic patterns. On one visit to some friends in Seattle, we all hoisted a VW bus on top, cut a hole in the bus and welded the two together. We were burning something in there other than wood, however. I don't think the neighbors of my friends appreciated it though.
I actually thought of this line -your title- (from one of the best movies of all time) today when dealing with a few crazy people.
Carry on.
I think I just saw him in Orange County! : )
Sounds like nirvana on wheels to me.
I'm still trying to figure out how old Brian is since he's talking about younger days and his photo looks like, I dunno, THIRTY????
:)))
"...Thailand, Tibet... Milton Keynes..."
Hahahahahahahahahahaha... best line in the whole piece :)
My family had a faded and sorry blue bus like that back in the 60s. It blew out black smoke that smelled of rotten eggs, and without air conditioning and the windows open, we were practically asphyxiated with every outing. Then we moved to Seattle from Phoenix. With our family of 8 inside it, plus a cranky, farting cat and a big hairy collie, we were quite the sight scooting down the road on a three-day drive.
Thanks for stirring up those memories!
My husband has dreams of buying a VW van...I'm not letting him read this.
do me a favor. If he ever says he is lonely, don't mention me.
Ha. The first 2 commenters are my 2 closest friends.
Anyway, part of me envies your friend's life. And then there's that other part of me that loves warm showers =)
Holy cow, I think your friend is my brother-in-law...
Aw. That brings back memories of a childhood holiday in a VW Caravanette.
It also brings back memories of the day that both my main brakes and my handbrake failed on my Reliant Robin as I was approaching a set of red traffic lights, travelling downhill.
The romantic dreamer in me really wants to go with him. And then I remembered that I freak out without stability and order.
Any activity that begins with come and see my van is never going to end well.
Is there an old VW that DOESN'T have an amazing story?
I think not.
How lovely it would be to live so unattached...
I've run into so many people like that over the years. Every one of them sniffing glue (or the like), every one of them just flat fun to be around. Actually, when I think about it, the craziest people I've met are usually health nuts and stone sober. Just high on life. I envy them.
I miss our old 61 Ford Econoline with the faux-stained glass contact paper windows and the "Keep on Truckin'" bumpersticker. All that was missing was the woodstove...
I love him!
You can get some great tiny wood burning stoves that are almost worth buying a van for.
Want one.
Ha! I have a friend like this. Only mine is old and crabby. Wanna trade?
They say who ones friends are tell a lot about a person.
I'm just catching on to the URL switch. I love that you have a post with a 'toliet' tag. I knew right away it would be a wonderful post.
Back in the day, I would have wanted to hang out in that van.
Brilliant. (I may have dated this guy once.)
VW van! I want one. Even one as knackered as his sounds
my sister and I had an old orange VW in high school. FLoor was so rusted you could see the road.
we loved it. HOWEVER, it NEVER took us to Norway.
What's a transit?
Will you really want to know...? Or pretend you don't know a thing?
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